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Ugh. I'm really tired. I've been working on blog for hours. Putting up posts that I'd written on notepads and trying to come up with new ideas. So now I can't think of anything for today's post. To make it worse I have to be up really early tomorrow to pick up a package containing the remnants of my New York life... blah I want to go to bed.

I think I'm going to curl up with my new book, Darjeeling, written by Bharti Kirchner. it's one of those books that I just pulled of the shelf at the library without knowing a thing about the story or whether the critics hated it or not. But I do know that darjeeling is my favorite type of tea, I figure that's good enough. It seems like an easy enough read, I need it after Kundera and Sartre. I'll post about what I think when I'm done.

Ciao!

Happy Birthday Mummy !!!!

Today's my mum's birthday. The older I get the more I value her and the time that I spend with her. Her sayings that annoyed me as a teenager are now the things that I long to hear and living away from home for so long has reminded how comforting her presence can be. Of course we still fight, we probably always will. She drives me crazy sometimes, I mean last week she corrected the way I was boiling water. Seriously. Water. How can you boil water wrong? These are the things that stir up fantasies of putting her in a retirement home. I tease her about it all the time, but she knows I never will because she's the best, the only, my mum.

NY Times and 20-Somethings

Here's an article from the NY Times about 20 somethings (me) who left home (me) didn't make it on their own (me) and moved back home (me) and who generally take a lot longer to become an adult in the financially-dependent-home-owning-baby-making sense of the word. It's reassuring that other people are having identical experiences and in large enough numbers to make me a statistic as opposed to a loser or worse a failure. I also feel a little better because this probably would not have been my story if the United States were not in the midst of an economic depression when I graduated from college. Also, in a strange way, I'm grateful for the tough experiences that I've had since graduating. Losing everything has a way of making you realize what's really important. I spent most of my life feeling embarrassed about being smart and being a bookworm. That will never happen again. I'm so much more appreciative of what I have and I'm more sure of my goals and interests than I've ever been. Now I know that when I do go back to school it won't be for want of better options. It will be because I want to pursue a field of study that I'm genuinely interested in. I've taken to referring to the last year as my "lost year" but when I think of how much I've matured in the last twelve months it's clear that it wasn't wasted at all.

Favorite Quote

My personal mantra is "make possible that which seems impossible." It's gotten me through many trials and tribulations, gruelling internships and examinations for which I was ill prepared.

The phrase "all human beings are born free and equal in dignity and rights" from the universal declaration of rights of man is the drive behind my day to day behavior (such as the way I treat the people I meet, live and work with) and my larger decisions as well (such as the things I choose to study in school, the type of work I'm drawn to etc.)

But my absolute favorite quote, the string of words to which I turn when I'm feeling happy, sad or just "whatever" comes from Kurt Vonnegut and it goes like this:

The arts are not a way to make a living
They are a very human way of making life more bearable
Practicing an art, no matter how well or how badly
Is a way to make your soul grow, for heaven's sake
Sing in the shower
Dance to the radio
Tell stories
Write a poem to a friend, even a lousy poem
Do it as well as you possibly can
You will get an enormous reward
You will have created something

Now THOSE are not just words to get you through the day, those are words you can model an entire life on. Isn't that all we want? To have created something greater than us, that will last beyond the span of our lifetimes. Money, fame, love aren't these really creations of man that are meant to do the one thing that we can't do? They're thought to last forever.

I think that's why I like writing so much, it's my way to satisfy the urge to create. I'm not sure if this is a good blog or not, I hope it is. I'm still proud of it either way. In the words of Mr. Vonnegut, the ability to look back on the way my thoughts and ideas have evolved through this medium will indeed be "an enormous reward."

Voting Day

You know those days when you just don't feel like doing anything? Yeah that was yesterday. Yesterday I didn't do shiet. But not today, today I was super productive. I voted! Here's a pick of our fingers stained with voters ink.


So... about the voting. I was a complete fool. I giggled the entire time, I followed the red line when I was supposed to follow the green one and I simply couldn't process the instructions on how to accurately fold my ballot. By the time I got to the final table the official must have been so convinced that I was a special needs voter that she gave me a little round of applause for not failing at dipping my right index finger into the tiny tub of voters ink. I don't blame her, I think my brain was on vacation that day. Throughout it all my sister pretended not to know me. Oh the shame.